So, I'm lazy!

I posted 2 days ago about the Flyladys program to help you get control of a chaotic life. And I have yet to do the first step of shining my sink. UGH. Not sure if I'm lazy or just defiant. I have done a few other things, but just not that one very begining thing. I feel like such a naughty thing I'm not even sure I wanna even try any more. The thunder is rumbling and it's really cool here today, and I'm still only want to sit on my tail and do nothing. What is my major malfunction already?? Kai

I say-

I'm playing along with Shannon at Rocks in my Dryer . It is a list of eight things I say every day. Here goes:

1. Gimme some Sugars! I gotta have my LOVE!
2. What is she squalling about now? (Meaning Emma cuz she will just scream for no reason or for any little thing.)
3. BE NICE TO YOUR BROTHER/SISTER!!!
4. Okay, time to pick up. (Usually the living room)
5. You do that one more time and you will go to your bed!
6. I love you honey!
7. Someone find Emma's binkey.
8. Stop whining. I can't hear you when you whine. Use your big girl voice and then well figure out the problem. (usually to Hannah cuz she whines about EVERYTHING!)

Okay...not much uplifting there, but you get the idea...LOL. Let me know if you wanna play too. Later Gaters, Kai!

Flylady

I know there are alot of people out there that have tried the Flylady way of trying to get ahold of thier chaotic lives. I have tried it....sort of....a few different times over the last 5 or so years. I am signed up to her reminder group so I can get her daily reminders, but I have honestly never ever followed them. And I probably won't. I don't think I can handle that many things to do in one day. At least not for the first few months. My mind just does not work that way. Not at the moment it doesn't any way. I can't keep up with more than one, or maybe two, if I am in an exceptionally good place that day, things at a time. So....on to trying to get my life in order. I know that getting counseling for my depression will help. But I have to be proactive as well....I guess. At least that's what everyone tells me. I don't know if I'm crazy or not. But I know the Flylady works for alot of people, so I'm gonna try. I'm not going to kill myself. I will do what I can when I can. And if I have a bad day......I just have to give myself the permission to be human. I am only one person! When I have 6 people in a house where no one ever puts anything away and just dumps their trash on the floor....it's gonna take more than one day to get control of it. Especially since I am pretty much alone in it. I have to figure out how to get the kids all involved in helping. And I have a few ideas, but getting them to do things without fighting me....as usual....is the key. Anyway....off to shine my sink and maybe do another load of dishes. Later Gaters, Kai.

Mount Washmore

I am very grateful that I didn't live in the time before automatic washers and dryers. Gratitude not withstanding.....I DISPISE doing laundry!!! Well.....not the washing and drying. That's not so bad, but I can't stand folding and getting it all put away. Not real sure why. But due to my depression the amount of dirty laundry has gotten so piled up it is scary. It had taken over the back part of the house in the form of 4 overflowing hampers and all over the floor almost up to our knees. We had gotten afraid of walking through it for fear of some strange creature poping out at us. Something kind of like Gollum from the Lord of the Rings. But I finally got sick of it. I'm still not feeling better, but I just couldn't stand to look at it any more. So yeasterday I braved Mount Washmore. I spent the whole day washing, drying, and folding laundry. Though I only did 6 loads, I managed to calm the beast to being only in the 4 hampers. Everything is up off the floor now. The biggest problem is that I have so much junk in my bedroom that I can't put it away. And it is all....YEP...Laundry! Most of it is clean and just needs to be put up. It's just getting time in there to do it without Emma up my butt. I think we have too many clothes. I know alot of people only have enough for everyone to have one outfit for every day of the week, but I don't think I could do that. But I am working on whittling it down. I did manage to get in my room this afternoon, with the help of big bubby to watch the monkey. I got almost all the clothes gone through and put away. I have 3 big black garbage bags full of things to go to the Goodwill. So it's a start. I need to put the clothes on the dryer away, but that has to wait until Emma is up from naps. Anyway....I managed to make myself a laundry schedual ala Flylady. I have tried her ideas in the past, but had a hard time keeping up with her schedual. Just too much for me. So I am gonna to try adjusting it to my needs. Which is her suggestion to begin with. I don't think I will ever have a perfect home, but I can't live like this much more. With or without my depression. I am really hoping that if I get help with my depression, I will be more able to do things. At least that is my prayer. Well.....at least I did something. Most days I don't do much of anything at all, but sit on my butt and watch tv cuz my brain just won't let me move. I don't know what the change is, but I'm working on it. We'll see. Okay...off to get more accomplished. Or maybe not. I'm not gonna push it. Slow and steady wins the race. Later Gaters. Love, Kai.

I'm alive.....

Sort of. I have started the ball rolling to finally get on some medication for my depression. It has gotten to the point that I cannot ignore it any longer. I have spent the last month sitting on my butt on the couch and doing barely anything that I am supposed to be doing. I can't keep up with anything cuz I can't make myself get up and do anything. I sometimes feel like I am walking into a wall just crossing the livingroom. I haven't been crying or anything like that, but it's been close. I've been trying not to complain about it much here in internet land, but I need to explain my absence. I am alive....sort of. But as soon as I can get seen by the State mental health people that my dh goes to...maybe I'll be able to do more and be better. That is my prayer. If I stay off and don't post much.....now you all know the reason. Cuz if it's not that I'm busy with family and kid stuff....but mostly it's been the depression. I just haven't had much to say that has been good....so I just haven't said anything at all. So now you know. Later Gaters....gotta go get Josh from work. Kai